Bugs

I was feeling paranoid after writing my previous post, so I hired a part-time bodyguard. He swept my kennel for bugs. He didn't find any, but that doesn't put my mind at ease.

I never fully accepted the consequences of running for office and making the details of my life public until now.

Sure, I can accept people watching me poo while I'm out walking. Or peeing on lamppost. I can accept many of the aspects of a celebrity life, but my nap time is private time. I wonder what kind of security package comes along with being the mayor. I'm going to need at least two secret service agents with me at all times, especially while I'm sleeping. One will scratch my ears while the other one scans my office for secret surveillance equipment.