A French Bulldog Prayer

St. Stephen's Catholic Church in Anoka is hosting the Annual Mayors' Prayer Breakfast this year on March 17th. Why on earth would you host this event on St. Patrick's Day, especially at a Catholic Church? The organizers are just asking for someone to pull out a beer bong and tap the communion wine.

Thoughts of drunken revelry aside, I wonder if they would let me speak at the breakfast this year. I have a prayer that I would like to share.

May our food dishes be full
May our water taste like beef
May Greenies be plentiful
So we keep all our teeth

May our stool be always solid
Many rabbits may we chase
Our kennels ne'er be squalid
Other doggies ne'er be chaste

We'll not whine, nor pass gas
Nor poop in the kitchen
For these things that we ask.
We thank you. Amen.